When People Suck . . .

People Suck When . . .

Archive for January, 2008

Jan
19

Religious A S S H O L E S

Posted under Things that Piss me Off by Angry Lioness

People who push their religion onto others are A S S H O L E S.  I am so sick and tired of tip-toeing around so I don’t offend someone. You know what, when a Ja-Ho-Ho knocks on my door during dinner with my family to drop off a pamphlet, he doesn’t appear to be overly concerned whether he is offending me, so from now on SCREW the Religious Zealots that aren’t happy unless they’re cramming their beliefs down someone else’s throat.
I was watching the news this evening, Yet ANOTHER Baptist Minister was caught soliciting a 13 yr old boy (undercover cop) for sex by sending him photos of little boys ages 5-10 having sex! Not only was he a Baptist minister the disgusting Douche Bag was ALSO a Teacher.

Why can’t we implement a DEATH Penalty for Sexual Predators? If they are concerned about who is going to pull the plug, push the button, flip the switch, etc, I’ll be more than happy to do it. You don’t even have to put a hood over their face, I would have no problem watching their eyeballs pop out, burst or their hair catch on fire.

All in all, I have NO problem with any religion or Spiritual path. I think EVERYONE should have Something higher than themselves (or humanity) to believe in. I don’t believe any one path it the “right” path. If it’s what you believe and it’s what gets you through the day, then it’s right for you.
With that said, if you are so insecure about your faith that you have to try to recruit others, then you SUCK & your religion SUCKS.  I call it insecurity- why?
Because it’s like asking a girlfriend to go with you to the john when you’re in a restaurant; you need someone to do the same thing as you, be there with you because you’re afraid your choice is WRONG. It’s like you’re saying “hold my hand and believe what I believe so I know I am right.”

GGGRRRRRRRR.

Business and Religion do NOT make Good Bed Fellows. There is nothing more of a turn off then going into a business to see Crosses hung on every wall, The Last Supper covered in cobwebs and dust.  Besides the fact that you spend your time as a consumer wondering if that’s their actual belief or is it a cheap Marketing ploy because they’re located within the “Bible Belt”.
Ok, so I recently found out from a Southern Gal that she finds it comforting to see Crosses hung in public places, she is able to take comfort in those. I personally had never thought of it that way, mainly because I don’t see them as a comfort.
Recently dh and I went to dinner and there was a cross hanging above every table, I wasn’t comforted. I was grossed out, all I picture when I see a cross is a guy NAILED to it, blood dripping from his hands and feet, sweat & tears running down his dirt dusted body, pain and suffering because, according the story, he was basically slaughtered.

As a child I was once sent to visit my Biological Father  Sperm Donor “Father”, his newest wife was Catholic and her mother was ill. I remember being in a musty old lady house, crosses hung throughout the entire house, a pained expression on the tormented face. I was sent to bed one night with a 3 foot cross hanging over the bed, while the ailing mother whom I’d never seen struggled to breathe through a tube in her throat in the next room over- sounding like a straw sucking the last drops of lemonade from the bottom of an empty glass. That slurpy dripping noise of impending death and that freak-ass cross hanging above my head, mildew & mouse urine laden blankets assaulting my nose and mice squeaking as they ran rampant through the unkempt halls.  I dreamt of demons that night, deep red razor backed demons with gold eyes and fangs and I’ll never forget it.

That’s what I see when I see a cross- Pain, Fear, Death,  not hope, not Love, not strength and certainly not Comfort.

And you know what; it’s not very fucking appetizing.

Jan
15

they charge you an arm and a leg. . .

Posted under Mary Fuckin' Poppins' by Angry Lioness

The fam and I thought it would be a great idea to check out the circus. After all, it’s not everyday you can see The Ringling Brothers- Barnum & Bailey show!   While the performance was absolutely WONDERFUL, very well choreographed and the animals appeared to be in excellent health and well taken care of, the Prices of the Food were Outrageous!

As we entered we got the normal post 9/11 treatment, empty your pockets, open your bags, hand over your camera etc. After the usual shakedown (which appeared to be more to prevent poor moms from bringing in water or snacks for their kids), we were permitted to enter. The lady behind us was forced to toss out a candy bar, a pack of gum and her new bottle of water.

We thought we’d be smart, we ate before we went and figured we’d allow each of our kids 1 treat- after all, the ticket prices for the circus ranged from $22-74 per PERSON just to get in the door. It didn’t take long for that Idea to shit the bed.

* A small box of popcorn $7.
* a Medium Lemonade $9.
* 1 Bag of Cotton Candy, $12. I SHIT you NOT. $12- and it wasn’t a large bag, it was smaller than a short loaf of gooey store bought-bread.
* Hamburger- No Cheese $6.
* Bottle of Water $3.25

Okay, it’s hot, it’s dry, theres a zillion people, our throats are parched. Ok, bite the bullet, we’ll buy a water and refill it. Haha, the joke is on us, a bottle of water is $3.25 and the bathrooms only have mist hand wash systems (good luck filling a bottle with that!). Not a single drinking fountain in the place and if you ask a concession stand vendor to please fill your bottle, they laugh and say, uh, No.

So now we’re inside, at our seats and the junk food peddlers are pushing their wares. . . and all I can hear is ‘ puh-cowen, puh-cowen, hut puh-cow-un heeah.”  I leaned over to my hubby and asked him what the hell they were saying. He translated “Popcorn, Popcorn, Hot Popcorn Here”.

MMM… Kayyyyy. Silly me, I wave him down and ask how much.. and he’s all too busy telling me what a bargain I’m getting. Whoa, wait a minute, back the train up… I didn’t say I was buying the shit, I asked HOW MUCH IS IT….

$7.00 . Yeah SEVEN Dollars… for the same amount you get in a microwave popcorn bag for .23 cents – and just as stale. I don’t think so.

We continue watching the show, enjoying the talents of the cast members, with the peddlers moving in and out of the rows time and time again.  I nearly lost it when the lady in front of us shelled out $24 for 2 tiny bags of Cotton Candy.  Apparently she must be rolling in the :dough: to be able to spend that kind of money on 2 bags of Cotton Candy. I had to laugh when ds pointed out we could rent a cotton candy machine for a day for that price.

What happened to the days of the entire family going to an event, having a hot dog or 2, a can of pop, a bag of chips and some sort of fried or sweet treat? These days, if you can afford tickets to get it to a show, you’re counting your pennies to make sure you’ll have enough Fumes in your gas tank to make it back home again afterwards.

Jan
14

Blue Laws…

Posted under Things that Piss me Off by Angry Lioness

So here it is, a beautiful Sunday morning, the Sun is shining, it’s 60+ degrees, and dh Finally has a day off. We have a bunch of errands to run, need a few groceries, and hubby needs some steel toe boots for work.

Fine… we go into walmart, spend half an hour digging through the shit on the shelves trying to find a pair that fit and Finally… FINALLY we find a pair that’s relatively comfortable. Another 15 minutes later, we have some half decent, albeit expensive, insoles to go with them. Grab a few more groceries, gallon of milk and we’re at the register.

The cashier looks up with a blank look on her face and holds up my husbands shoes… “You can buy these before 1:30 pm”.

me:   Um, I’m sorry What the Fuck??

She says, “You can’t buy shoes before 1:30 pm”.

I said, yes ma’am, I heard you the first time, WHY Not??

her: “Well the Blue Law.”

me: Okay, I’ll bite, what the hell is the BLUE Law??

Her: “Well, you shouldn’t be shopping, you should be at church. Since your not, you cant buy any merchandise- no shoes, clothes, electronics, etc. Just groceries.”

:rtfm: Um, Ex-Fucking-Scuse Me????

She said, “Well, it’s like liquor or alcohol, you cant buy it before 1:30pm”

Well, that’s just flipping Ducky dearie,  but I’m pretty sure I’m not going to drink my work boots!!!

“Well, that laws been in effect for over a hundred years and that’s just how it is”.  :yank:

So we finished ringing up and left the work shoes, the insoles and a fucking thermometer behind (yeah, apparantly you cant buy a thermometer when you have the goddamn flu, because you should be in CHURCH not Shopping!). At that particular moment I felt likeburning down the nearest congregation.

Fuckers.

Jan
13

. . . the dont put out.

Posted under Things that Piss me Off by Angry Lioness

Are you thinking that was a sexual statement? Well, it’s not. It’s about those moronic companies that we all pay hundreds of dollars to each year – that claim they will provide “insert whatever service floats your boat here”, only to find that they DONT PUT OUT. It’s all a big crock of shit isn’t it?

For example, I pay (alot) of money for a dedicated server. A few days ago I get an email that their server was experiencing issues and they “lost” some data, despite the backups- which incidentally were also lost. So… if I would be so kind, would I log into my account and create new ones with a new file name.

For Christsake’ I suppose, if I have to. I think I’d rather have teeth pulled with novacaine, but okay, fine. Shit happens. So, of course I log into my server only to find that the backup is now corrupt and will no longer function. So, I send out an email back to support to let them know their “issues” certainly aren’t fixed. This is 5 fucking days ago… I have called 11 Times. .. Do you mean to tell me that they can’t get the lead out of their asses and reset the back up server in FIVE DAYS TIME????

So, I call again this morning, not only is the back-up not functioning, but neither are any of the mailing lists. I have over 12,000 people on my email list that are expecting Newsletters but can I get them out, OHhhhhh NOOOOOO. (Yeah, that was as frigging sarcastic as I could get it to sound without adding a friggin’ sound byte.)

So, we are heading into Day 6 of “My hosting Company Techs have their fingers up their asses, yet they still won’t Put OUT.

~Pissed Off Lioness

Jan
12

. . . They don’t provide what you paid for . . .

Posted under Things that Piss me Off by Angry Lioness

You pay a goddamn fortune for web hosting only to have their server crash, or your “backup” files erased. Then, when you call the tech line, some guy in god knows what frigging country answers, doesn’t speak a word of English & can’t help you because “the technicians are not available”. Assuming that is actually what they said, because who the hell can decipher, “IyimmsoVirySoiree, theeetechyneeshunss keeeNootT heelpuyoo.”

Grrrrrr. Score 1 for the tiger that ate the little bastard that aggravated him at the zoo. If only we were all so lucky.
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Jan
11

What’s their Job?

Posted under Things that Piss me Off by Angry Lioness

I’ve been here several months, just bought the place, relocated from halfway across the frigging country.  Low and behold, although I’ve found a beautiful piece of property (once I got the bulldozed mess cleaned up- a long story best kept for another day!), I contacted the phone company about setting up internet service- Dial Up- of all things. Yet another long story.

So the “tech” – and I use that term loosely, sets up the account, but screws it up, adding a digit in front of the username. No problem he tells me, I’ll take care of it. I say, ” no worries, I don’t mind that I’ve already been on the phone 43 minutes to CREATE a username” (that should take about 5 minutes), but hell I didn’t say a word.  Get my first months bill- they double charge me for the service. Call them up and in my most patient manner I can muster, I explain the error. No worries, they’ll credit me on Next Months bill, but I have to Pay THIS bill, ($76 in error!) in full. Ooookay.

I pay the damn bill. Next Months Bill comes, same issue- they’ve double billed me, only this time, they bill me for a second line as well. Again, I spend nearly an hour on the phone, finally they state that it will be credited, NEXT Month, but I must pay this bill in full.

Next Months Bill arrives, it is now November, they credit me for double charging in Sept and October but then turn around and Double Charge me On top of the Credit for the previous Months! Are you fucking Shitting me???

After another 28 minutes on the phone I am assured that this will NOT happen again. (Yeah, want to fucking bet?)

So I just get ANOTHER Phone bill, by now I have OVERPAID $166. and have been credited back $33.  Now, the bill shows a credit to Dec 1, but then Double Charges me for 2 accounts during the month of December. So I call, the customer service lady is quite thrilled to pass me through to Internet billing- apparantly she didn’t need a new asshole (and I was more than ready to rip her one), Internet Billing lady then explains that, “Why Yes, Ms. Angry Lioness, your account was cancelled, but the service rep didn’t have the authority to give you a credit, which will now appear on your NEXT bill. Please be sure to Pay THIS bill in full.

Yeah, I’ll get right on that, and while I’m at it, could you send me a mattress size cheeze grater and a kiddie pool full of alcohol so I have something to slide down?

Grrrrrr.

Jan
10

Useless Real Estate Brokers…

Posted under I'm Over It, Things that Piss me Off by Angry Lioness

Perhaps you know one… it shouldn’t be hard to find one these days. I know several, hell, our real estate broker is about as useless as they come.

Our house has been on the market for a year, with 3 showings, total in that timeframe. The last showing was 3 months ago, and although I would love to be able to share the feedback, the useless bastard couldn’t be bothered to follow up with the broker that showed the house and provide me with any. You know what pisses me off the most? I asked the lazy prick… “You are familiar with the Market, You know what’s out there, what’s for sale, What do YOU Recommend I list the house for?”

I had an appraisal in hand, I also know an appraisal doesn’t mean jack shit. I wanted to know What the broker Felt the house should list for to make it competitive with the other properties in the area. His response, “well, um, that’s up to you”. Well Holy Shit, thanks for that Bright Well Thought Out Articulate Fucking response Jack-o.

I realize the market has turned to shit the last year. When I listed the house I told the lazy son of a bitch that my main concern was Communication. I expect an email at least 2 times a month letting me know what (if any) marketing has been done on the house. Was it in a friggin’ rag somewhere? Did you post it on the internet? Did you tell your cousin fred you just listed it?

But no, in the last 6 months, I have received a total of 3 emails, only after I called and left a message, and only because the listing was expiring. Then, on top of it, the dumb ass lists it in the MLS as a 1 1/2 story house. I’m sorry, but how is a 2 story house WITH an Attic only a 1 and half story house??  Please do explain that to me…

So fuck it, the house is for sale and I couldn’t wait to get the hell out of dodge, so we packed up our shit and left anyway. I shut the power off, shut the water off, dumped a few buckets of antifreeze down the lines and locked the door on my way. And NO, in case your wondering, No, the door did NOT hit me in the ass on the way out. I was in too much of a hurry for that to happen.